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Q

My Dad always makes a big effort to hang out with us on the weekends. He takes us to the pool and we get hot chips and icecream and watch DVD’s afterwards. Its pretty good really. But then he asks us what fun things Mum has done with us over the week and then I feel crappy with Mum cause she’s just making me do my homework and I have to unpack the dishwasher. I wish Mum would do more good things with us.

A

It sounds as though your Dad is making a big effort to show you how much he wants to hang out with you and how much he loves you.

Your Mum is doing the same thing, even though it probably doesn’t feel like it right now. Your Mum wants you to do well at school and to have some responsibilities at home. These aren’t the most fun things to do, but they are going to help you as you get older and become more independent.

In a funny way while your Dad might mean well by asking about how you and your Mum spend your time, it might be that it's unhelpful as it prompts you to see your Mum as somebody who isn’t that much fun to be around at the moment. Try talking to your Dad and asking him if he could not talk to you about what you and your Mum do together. You could also have a talk to your Mum and suggest a shared activity that you can do every now and then for fun. It might be as simple as playing a board game, taking the dog for a walk or watching your favourite show together on TV.

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separation and divorce